And so I'm back at work.

It's been great since he got back :) Fetched him at the airport - my mom and sister Liza followed to the airport, and his parents and oldest brother and 2 nephews did too. My dad came to the airport to fetch my mom after that.

I was driving to the airport when he sms me "hi baby.. I'm back with loads of love. hehe. miss you so much. can't wait to see you" Started grinning like mad and announced (heh) to the people in the car that he's safely back. Once I reached the airport, I called him and he said he's at the bookshop inside, asked me if I want any books (which I wanted actually but I want him to come out faster more)

He came out about 5 minutes later. Wearing what he wore in the 2nd picture in the last entry. I was abit surprised at what he was wearing actually, hehe, because, although I knew he was going to be wearing the quiksilver pants I got him, he said he was going to wear a black polo tshirt. Sekali he wore this darkgreen shirt which if I have any say, I won't allow him to buy at all, hahah.

But oh well, he still look so cute. so gorgeous. i so miss him :) he's so blind, didn't see us at all. his friend (who accompanied him to accompany me to SGH) saw me first and smiled, and then Mazreen saw my mom and went over to salam, then went over to his parents and salam and then his bro....

... and then baru came over to my side and said hi. and then. i love you. hehehe. And then he talked to everyone a bit and then he went outside to smoke.

oh ini orang yang aku banyak sayang.. has been smoking macam nonstop can. He did tell me when he was in Thailand he smoked a lot because cigs are cheap and many other excuses.. but I thought he won't continue smoking so heavily when he's back, but oh I'm wrong. And everytime I nag he will pretend not to hear and then when I get annoyed, he will grin (so cutely) that I will stop being annoyed too. But it did end up in an argument on Tuesday - I tried to light up his cig in the middle so that it will finish faster (haha) but he managed to duck away, so ok 1st attempt foiled. 2nd attempt, I told him I will clear out that ash thing for him from the cig. Sekali I did it wrongly (how to know how to do properly, I'm not a smoker!) and the flame died. Heheh. He got annoyed and so I got annoyed and then it became an argument. Took an hour before things became good again, but u know, life's good.

Yesterday we went to Taka, to buy presents for the newborns in the family. Bought OshKosh shoes for his babynephew, who is 6 mths old, and a BabyGuess dress for my babyZahra, who is 1.5 mths old. And 2 tops for Liza. So we looked shoppy, hehe. Went to watch Wedding Crashers after that. So kelakar ok that movie!!

"You shut your mouth when you are talking to me!"

Hahaha. We burst out laughing at that part, it was so kelakar. And was repeated manymany times after the movie. Haha :) After the movie we went to Pizza Hut at Centrepoint, and had beef lasagne, super supreme, hut's platter and a pasta mania or sausage mania or something mania, whatever the name is. That mania thing is really nice, although very muak to eat after half a plate, but it was very nice, so go try. Mazreen finished off everything that I couldn't finish (which is good, I love a guy who does that for me, hehe) and we sat back and talked a bit and then continued the convo on the way home all the way til we reach my house.

It was a good convo, needless to say, as all convos about future is. It was kindof heavy though, with talks of finances, and promises, and coming to a compromise about something sooo important that I think I will forget that we compromised about this. Seriously. Hahaha. Because it's something so important to us, and unfortunately our views about it is a teenyweeny bit (actually it's a lot, haha) different, so having to compromise was quite difficult. But it's workable, it's solvable, so all's good.

Last night after we talked on the phone, and going to bed, I stayed up and had so many thoughts about us that I felt compelled to blog. But I thought it might come out too mushy, so I stayed on my bed. A bad decision, because the thoughts haunted me til 2am. Hehe.

Anyhoo here. I'm bored so might as well blog.

For the past 1.5 mths when Mazreen was away at Thailand, I maintained another blog where I felt free-er to express a lot of thoughts in my head without being judged. That was where I blogged about how I couldn't cope without him (yeah yeah pathetic) and well, many other r/s stuff. I blogged a lot on shids.blogspot but you know, having a constant readership (cheh!) makes me fill like I can't really be open about negative stuff anymore here.

So last night I thought, I don't want to change the way I blog here. My blog, either the old one (before I move to shids) or this old new-blog, has always been about me and Mazreen, about relationships, about me actually. Without worrying about how people might perceive it, etc. And when I read my archives, especially in the weeks coming to my engagement, I felt that those entries were the better ones because I was most honest in those entries.

I want to blog that way again. All negativities and positives and everything in between, all in one blog. And so I will (which is why this entry macam superlong maybe)

Heheheh. I feel like merepek suddenly now. So anyways, I shut down that blog this morning and felt.. a bit sad actually. Hehe. But it makes me happy in a very willywonkaweird way knowing that I will be blogging here more, and I want to be back to my normal blogging way of talking nonstop about me and Mazreen. I love Mazreen btw, do you know? Hehehe.

Last night as I lay awake thinking about us, I felt so happy knowing that he's back.. safe, Alhamdulillah. How I prayed when he was at Thailand and at India, praying for his safety, his health, etc. And when he was in India, there were those floods at India, in the Maharashtra state, and that was exactly where Mazreen was at, and although yes I am saddened by the many deaths there, I was so relieved Mazreen was at Thailand instead. And then I read about birdflu in Thailand, and Mazreen calmed me down by saying that they aren't allowed to eat chicken in Thailand anyway - only seafood (which mazreen is allergic to) I dunno, maybe he did come back thinner. I just know he came back cuter (heh) and much more tanned.

The relief of him being back safely, and the feeling that he's now in S'pore makes me feel safe. And our relationship, makes me feel blessed, contented, happy.

Especially when he cups my face in his hands, and tells me I'm beautiful. Hehe :)

Ah. Just hung up the phone. He called to say he loves me. Heheheh. See? I miss this. I miss these random calls just to say he misses me, or he loves me. When he was at Thailand I had none of these calls.. so yeah I missed it so much, hehe.

When/If he has more free time he will pretend to berkenalan, or he pretends he's some DJ and ask if I want to dedicate song to my fiance lah, what song is my favourite at the moemtn and then he will go memorise the lyrics and sing the song to me endlessly (which gets annoying sometimes when he just wdn't stop, hahah) This kind of nonsense, I like. A lot. The berkenalan phone calls makes me feel that he's still flirting with me, which makes me fall for him more. Hehehe.

Sigh. I love him a lot lah. There's like this whole dam-burst sortof feeling; overwhelming. But I'm back to my normal sappy self, I'm happy, and nothing can get me down! (for this moment lah. hehe)

--

I heard this song on Class 95 and fell in love with it. Even though Mazreen's back, I'm still into songs with these kindof theme. hehe :)

Babe (by Styx)
Babe, I'm leaving, I must be on my way
The time is drawing near
My train is going, I see it in your eyes
The love, the need, your tears
But I'll be lonely without you
And I'll need your love to see me through
So Please believe me, my heart is in your hands
And I'll be missing you.
(sooo kena with my situation kan?? hehe)

Cause You know it's you Babe
Whenever I get weary and I've had enough
Feel like giving up
You know it's you Babe
Giving me the courage and the strength I need
Please believe that it's true
Babe, I love you.

Babe, I'm leaving, I'll say it once again
Somehow try to smile
I know the feeling we're trying to forget
If only for a while
Cause I'll be lonely without you
And I'll need your love to see me through
But Please believe me, my heart is in your hands
Cause I'll be missing you
Babe, I love you.


And the sweetest thing from Ifah's blog. Thanks!! I had a nice time chatting with her just now, and she's just the sweetest la :)

--

One of his kedai kopi friends' wedding's next week. I have met the bride-to-be before, she's very nice, very bubbly sortof girl, without airs, and I like her because she told me I lost weight after not seeing me for about 6 mths (although she did add, "muka you sampai macam dah cengkung (sp?) sikit tau!" -not sure if this is a compliment or not?!)

And yesterday Pag called to invite us to Syaza's birthday party, which will be held at the zoo on 3rd Sept. Zoo ok! Mazreen's excited because we have never been to the zoo together, haha.

And this weekend to Zahra's cukur rambut.

Oh our calender's filled! (padahal baru 3 benda, haha)

My baby's back and I'm happy today. He doesn't like me calling him baby actually, hehehe. I already miss him, but he's in S'pore, so you know, the feeling isn't that bad *huge smile*